Moments from

"PRINCE CHARMING'S COMPLAINT"
A Male Monologue
by Bruce Kane

A modern look at the legendary prince who reveals for the first time the truth about the dysfunctional women he married - including Rapunzel of hair fame and Snow White, who was anything but - the problem with "The Happily Ever After Syndrome," the mothers-in-law he was cursed with and the mysterious new woman he recently met at the ball.

(copyright Bruce Kane Productions 2004)

(This play cannot be performed without permission of Bruce Kane Productions)

(Visit our Obtaining Scripts for information on obtaining a complete version ofthis play)

PRINCE CHARMING’S COMPLAINT
By Bruce Kane

Time: The Present

Place: Here and Now

(Over the P.A. System we hear the sixties recording “Rescue Me.” If you don’t have access to the record, then have Prince Charming sing the opening lyrics as he enters: “Rescue me. Take me in your arms. Rescue me. I want your tender charms. Cause I’m lonely and I’m blue.” If you do have the record then pick up the dialogue with the line “Anybody remember that song?”

(Prince Charming enters.)

PRINCE CHARMING: Anybody remember that song? That’s right. “Rescue Me”. Fontella Bass… 1965. A golden oldie. To most people it’s a golden oldie. Except for the women I married. To them it’s the national anthem. Maybe it’s the white charger… Maybe it’s the suit of armor… Maybe it’s the royal title… I don’t know. But what I do know is that for some reason the only kind of women I seem to attract are women with a desperate need to be rescued. If only I’ll save them from whatever hell they’ve been forced into, they’re convinced life will be wonderful.

There have been a lot of women in my life… I don’t deny it. I love women. I don’t trust any man who doesn’t love women. My mistake is in marrying them. I’ll give you an example. My first wife… Rapunzel… Great name, isn’t it? Rapunzel. You don’t run into many girls these days named Rapunzel. A lot of Brittany’s and Taylor’s but no Rapunzels. I used to love just saying her name… Rapunzel. When I first met her she’d been locked in a tower by her mother. That should’ve been my first clue. You have to wonder about a woman whose been locked away in a tower by her own mother.

(The monologue continues...)