ONE ACT PLAYS FEMALE MONOLOGUES MALE MONOLOGUES JUSTIN THYME MYSTERIES
All plays and monologues are available for immediate download. Click Here to purchase a play.
Royalties are required on ALL performances of our plays and monologues.
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
ONE ACT PLAYS FEMALE MONOLOGUES MALE MONOLOGUES JUSTIN THYME MYSTERIES |
|||||
All plays and monologues are available for immediate download. Click Here to purchase a play. Royalties are required on ALL performances of our plays and monologues. |
|||||
|
|||||
“MIRROR,
MIRROR ”
A One Act Comedy
by Bruce Kane
Copyright:
Bruce Kane Productions 2009
All Rights Reserved
22448 Bessemer St.
Woodland Hills, CA 91367
PH: 818-999-5639
E-mail: bkane1@socal.rr.com
All plays owned by Bruce Kane Productions are protected by copyright law and may not be performed without written permission from Bruce Kane Productions. To obtain permission go to www.kaneprod.com/contact.htm
This excerpt is provided as an example of the complete play and may not be performed or presented publically.
“MIRROR,
MIRROR ”
A One Act Comedy
by Bruce Kane
CHARACTERS:
STEPMOTHER: Of a certain age… Slim, attractive, insecure, overly done
up.
MIRROR: Put upon Male with attitude.
NARRATOR: Male, strong voiced.
SLEEPING BEAUTY: Young , hot, shallow.
PRINCE CHARMING: Young, handsome, polite, pompous.
PRINCE CHARMING’S DAUGHTER: Hot
PRINCES: Suitors for the hand of Sleeping Beauty. Could be played by one or
two males doubling the parts.
TIME: Once upon
a time.
PLACE: A land far, far away.
SETTING: An upholstered chaise, a lectern and the frame of a full length mirror.
(Excerpt #1 from "Mirror, Mirror")
LIGHTS UP:
(The STEPMOTHER stands in front of a full length mirror primping and admiring herself. The NARRATOR stands on the other side of the stage reading from a large book that sits on a lectern. Between them is an upholstered chaise.)
NARRATOR: Once upon a time in a land far, far away… lived a woman who was vain, self-centered, ego centric…
STEPMOTHER: Not to mention slim, firm and very, very attractive..
NARRATOR: A woman who was vain, self centered, ego centric, not to mention slim, firm and very, very attractive… who believed that the only thing in life that counted was physical beauty.
STEPMOTHER: Mirror, mirror on the wall…
(A man appears in the mirror)
MIRROR: That’s me. I’m the mirror on the wall. Talk about a lousy gig.
STEPMOTHER: Stop whining. You could be reflecting the image of some has-been with crow’s feet and a chicken neck.
MIRROR: Lay it on me, honey.
STEPMOTHER: Mirror, mirror on the wall…
MIRROR: Here it comes.
STEPMOTHER: Who’s the fairest of them all?
MIRROR: You’ve been asking me this same question everyday since you’re last birthday when you turned…
STEPMOTHER: Thirty two.
MIRROR: Thirty two? Then why did you have fire marshals standing by when they lit the candles?
STEPMOTHER: Never mind.
NARRATOR: Consumed by her own physical appearance, each day she would ask the same question.
STEPMOTHER: Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?
NARRATOR: And each day she would get the same answer.
MIRROR: Before or after the nose job, the face lift, the tummy tuck and the boob job?
STEPMOTHER: (sternly) Just answer the damn question.
MIRROR: Fine… You are the fairest of them all.
STEPMOTHER: (sweetly) That’s better.
MIRROR: (under his breath) At least in this zip code.
NARRATOR: It was hard to argue with her belief in beauty as the be all and end all for a woman of a certain age.
STEPMOTHER: Which I am not. A woman of a certain age.
NARRATOR: I’m
just reading what’s written here.
(Excerpt #2 from later in "Mirror, Mirror)
STEPMOTHER: Good… Now who’s the fairest of them all?
MIRROR: Your stepdaughter by a mile.
(Angrily, the Stepmother picks up a hard object to throw at the mirror)
MIRROR: Seven years bad luck to break a mirror… Especially for the mirror.
STEPMOTHER: There is no way that my stepdaughter could be the fairest in the land… It’s impossible.
(Accompanied by drum beats, the stepdaughter struts in like a modern day pop singer, all legs, hips and shoulders. She bumps and grinds her way to center stage and then along the footlights, finally striking a sexy pose at center stage.)
STEPDAUGHTER: Hiya… Mom.
STEPMOTHER: I told you never to call me that. I have never been and never will be your…mom.
STEPDAUGHTER: (She primps in front the mirror) Hello, gorgeous.
MIRROR: Hello to you, too.
STEPDAUGHTER: I was talking to my image.
MIRROR: So was I.
STEPDAUGHTER: You’re cute.
MIRROR: You ain’t so bad yourself.
NARRATOR: The woman had not only been replaced but rudely and abruptly shoved aside. Her beauty paling in comparison to that of her younger, prettier, firmer, tighter and very, very, very hot stepdaughter.
(The Stepmother has seen and heard enough.)
STEPMOTHER: Oh yeah?
(She produces a hypodermic needle and jams it into the Stepdaughter’s behind. The Stepdaughter stumbles around and finally collapses onto an upholstered chaise.)
STEPMOTHER: Correction. Temporarily replaced and shoved aside. You got that, book boy?
NARRATOR: Temporarily replaced and shoved aside.
STEPMOTHER: Okay, mirror… Let’s try this one more time. Am I still the fairest in the land?
MIRROR: (frightened) Whatever you say, lady… Whatever you say.
(The play continues)
One
Act Plays & Monologues
kaneprod.com